Introducing a guest post by Stephanie Berryman with her personal story.
How I finally managed to go Gluten and Dairy Free, and Why
I love food. I’m the kind of woman who moans over butter melting on to hot fresh bread. I’ll drive across the city at eleven at night for a good plate of pasta. I kept a local bakery in business for years with my addiction to their ginger cookies. And, don’t even talk to me about the Whole Foods Belgian Chocolate Chip Cookies. At $6 for a pack of 6, they just about bankrupted me. I love food. And for the past six months, I haven’t been eating most of what I love. No warm bread with butter melting on it, no deliciously creamy pasta, none of those soft ripe cheeses that are heaven on the tongue, no ice cream or cookies. Surprisingly, I’m feeling really good about not enjoying all of these foods that bring so much delight to my life. I’ve actually been considering spending the rest of my life abstaining. Crazy, right?
Why?
Let me tell you why I’m thinking this way. When I was nineteen, I did a wild and wonderful six-month backpacking trip through Europe and the Middle East. I got sick in Egypt. Classic food poisoning that leaves you wrecked and drained but then you bounce back. Except I never quite bounced back. My doctor diagnosed Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS) and told me I was in for a challenging time digestively. She was right. I kept eating what I loved and spent much of my life doubled over with cramps, running to the washroom in a panic or severely constipated. At some point in my 20’s I went to a naturopath who suggested I do a cleanse for six weeks – no sugar, no dairy, no wheat (they didn’t focus on gluten as the specific problem back then). I suffered through it and swore I’d never do anything like it again. Too much sacrifice. ‘Life is short, eat dessert first’ has always been my motto.
Fast Forward
Fast forward to last summer when, at the age of 42, I had emergency gall bladder removal surgery. The surgeon assured me it wouldn’t impact my IBS and that I may have a few weeks of adjustment period to digesting fatty foods but then my body would compensate. Let’s just say it didn’t turn out quite that way.
After crapping my pants twice, once in a Starbucks after treating myself to a delicious chai latte, I decided maybe it was worth seeing a naturopath again. I even went as far as to take a food sensitivity test. Turns out that as much as I love them, dairy and gluten really don’t like me. We have a toxic relationship. I keep loving them and they keep hurting me. So I figured maybe we should take a break. That was early December. Right before Christmas. I didn’t eat wheat or dairy over the Christmas holidays. My husband kept commenting on how amazed he was at my self control. Whenever I looked at the (insert amazing food that I love here – brie, pie, cookies, etc), all I could see was the end result – the cramps, the pain, the race to the washroom, the exhaustion. This looking ahead has helped me to live gluten and dairy free for months, a feat I never would have considered possible before now.
I have faltered, I’m not going to lie – it’s been a lifetime of toxic love, it’s hard to walk away from that kind of dynamic. This Easter I slathered my turkey with gravy because what’s the point of turkey without gravy? Gravy is made with flour. I regretted my indulgence for days. A few months ago, we went to visit family. My brother-in-law makes a mean mudslide, a drink that involves Bailey’s Irish cream. It’s tradition. We visit every year and every year he makes us mudslides. I couldn’t resist. The next day we had to abort a trip to the beach so we could drive to the nearest washroom. I barely made it.
Substitutions
In addition to considering the likely results of consuming dairy or gluten, I’ve also found some delicious replacements. I’m lucky enough to live in a west-coast hippy city so gluten-free bread and pasta are readily available, both in stores and restaurants. I’ve also rekindled a long-lost love – Soy Delicious Chocolate Velvet Frozen Dessert. We spent a few months together in my early 20’s when I was attempting to be a vegan. It’s almost as good as the real stuff with none of the bad results. And we have this donut store that’s literally a block away from my house that has gluten-free and dairy-free donuts. Salted caramel is my new great love. I love it and it loves me. Goat cheese brie and I are also flirting. There’s a bit of a spark, nothing like what I felt with Cambazola but it’s close enough and goat cheese brie likes me way more than Cambazola. I’m finding new sweets and treats that I enjoy, focusing on the way they nourish me.
Starting new habits is never easy, neither is restricting your diet in any way but focusing on the results – both good and bad and finding delicious replacements has helped me embrace a gluten-free and dairy-free lifestyle.
Nicole here: I have to share Stephanie’s story with because it is similar to my own. My girls are gluten intolerant and food sensitivities change their behavior, and ultimately, the way we cook. I’ve written about it here, and here.
Food sensitivities, can be life changing. Share a food story, or sensitivity needs, in the comments below.
Stephanie Berryman is a a writer, a leadership consultant and coach, a teacher, a parent, and a spouse amongst other things. Her mission in life is to support people to have good lives in spite of the stress and overwhelm they may be experiencing. On her blog she writes about the various ways we can create more meaningful, more connected, more relaxed, and happier lives. She can be found at stephanieberryman.com. if you sign up for her newsletter, you’ll receive a free copy of her e-book, ‘The Good Life Manifesto: The 7 Essential Elements of a Living a Good Life’.
“Starting new habits is never easy” – so true. But worth it! Thanks!
Hi Mike! Thanks for popping in to say hi. Tom Petty might say, “The waiting is the hardest part”. That might be true. In this case I think getting started is the hardest part.
Hi Nicole! First of all, glad I found this blog – it is a great topic that needs more attention. And thanks to Stephanie for sharing her story 🙂
I was never diagnosed with IBS but had suffered from all kinds of small seemingly unrelated issues – severe cystic acne, depression/anxiety, fatigue, severe PMS, “random” tongue swelling. I also thought I was “sensitive” to coffee because whenever we would go to a diner for breakfast and I had coffee, I would run to the bathroom before the check came. I complained about all of these issues to every primary doc and OB/GYN (and we have moved a lot, so I’m talking at least 7 different medical professionals). They all diagnosed the same anti-depression drugs, suggested I get more sleep (with two young kids?! HA!!) and regarding the tongue, they would ask “Are you allergic to any foods?” to which I would respond “No” and they would say, it could be minor irritation from blah blah.
I finally saw a wellness doctor in Sugar Land TX. I filled out a 20 page detailed intake form and sat with the PA in the office for almost 2 full hours. They did a series of blood testing, including food sensitivities, hormones and chemical depletion. It turns out almost all of the healthy foods I was eating were creating massive amounts of inflammation in my body. I learned, after 36 years of life, that I am severely allergic to avocados, almonds, cashews (and therefore latex), mushrooms, apples… the list goes on. And my “coffee sensitivity” turned out to be way off – it was the eggs that were tearing up my stomach and making the hot, spiky ball tearing through my digestive system!!
It took a solid 2 and a half years of very healthy eating, as well as a protocol to heal my gut. I was treated for candida and now take a daily probiotic and feed my body all kinds of pre and probiotics via kombucha and fermented foods. I am 4 years post the initial diagnosis. I am happy to say I no longer have the mood and fatigue issues. My skin looks even better at 40 than it did at 20. And while I still have an allergic reaction to several foods (the ones that made my mouth swell), my gut is healed enough that I can tolerate small amounts of gluten. I still avoid dairy because it causes hormonal breakouts along my jawline.
I will say, I recently fell off the wagon earlier this year – stress eating lots of sugar, processed foods and gluten – and my mood plummeted like I haven’t seen in years. But I was diligent for 2 months, cleaned up my diet and I feel better already. I look forward to reading more about your journey!
Hello, Valerie! Thanks so much for your vulnerability to share your food story. It has obviously transformed your life. Glad to see you are feeling better. It is amazing how many people I meet that say a test didn’t diagnose their food triggers.
I love kombucha. Actually, just finished a glass. If you’d like to brew your own at home you might give this a look: https://wetalkhealthy.com/kombucha-whats-drink/ I’d like to know more about how candida works for you and if you used detox options.
Please let me know if I can investigate anything for you. It’s my passion and my pleasure.